An Open Letter To Minister Of Community and Social Services About Young People Leaving Care

Dear Minister;

I know you are busy. I know you are stressed. I think that we are in such difficult times and governments are dealing with the circumstances of the times as best they think they can I ask you though to take a moment and reflect.

Imagine you had a child who was living away from home on their own. Your child was 21 years old. You had been supporting them every month with a small cheque for rent and food in order for them to be able to go to school. You were there for them. Then the pandemic hit. What you decided to do was tell your child there would be no more cheques. Further you would say “here is a number to call at social assistance. You are not ever able to call me again.” Imagine that. You can’t imagine that I bet.

Minister that is exactly what you  are doing.  Right now.  Today. 

As you know no child comes into your care as Minister through the child protection system for something they have done. You Minister through your child protection system with courts have decided that these children are in need of protection. You have taken them from their homes. You know the kinds of things that they were dealing with that made you make that decision. You Minister have promised to care and support these children. The children may have even expected love from you.

You are aware Minister that you have not been a very good parent to them. Moving them from home to home to home. Not always present. Hardly listening. Seldom finding any love from you. You have promised to be a better parent. For at least two years you have made this promise. Those who had custody of your children in their role as Minister before you made the same promises. Empty promises.

You Minister were all these children had so they survived. At least most have survived. You have always told them that you would provide them a meagre cheque to use to live on their own when they are 18 years of age and that they could contact you if they needed something. It didn’t matter if they were ready or not to be on their own. You then told them that, no matter what , this cheque and those calls for support would vanish when they turned 21 years of age. Your children told you “but it feels like we are being pushed off the edge of a cliff alone. Alone”. Minister you acted as if it was the way it had to be.

Today Minister you and your children live in a veritable maelstrom caused by the Covid 19 Pandemic and our public health response to it. Community centres are closed. Mental health services stretched thin. Landlords thinking about evictions. Even places of worship unavailable. Every potential support for young person on their own torn asunder. All of us, including you Minister, worrying about our personal well being and the well being of those we love.

Except Minister you continue to tell your children, as they turn 21 years of age , children who have depended upon you that you will not give them money to pay for their rent and food. You tell them not to call home. You tell them as you push them out the door into the abys of this pandemic crisis that you are making a plan. Maybe you are Minister I don’t know and I don’t know what kind of plan it will be. Certainly you did not ask your children about it.

Wouldn’t it be better Minister if you said right now, today, to your children “I care about you. I would like you to stay connected with me if you want to. I will continue to be there for you. We’ve got this. I am planning to do even better” Wouldn’t that be better Minister. Isn’t it time you became a better parent right now Minister.

Minister I know your children well. I can promise you that even uttering those words publicly and immediately would be a salve and a powerful source of emotional assurance. You can do this Minister and don’t forget your younger children are watching what you do. Every thing you do is a message to them.

Now Minister. Do the right thing.

Sincerely,

Irwin